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Posts Tagged ‘ruffles’

Fake it till you make it

26 Oct

{ personal: }

I’m not advocating you lie or mislead anyone. I’m talking specifically about the practice of practicing. This came up in a class I take recently, some participants were unclear on the supposed implications of deceiving another. The idea behind faking it until you fully realize it is the earnest commitment to a particular value system.

For example, I have been shockingly unladylike behind the wheel. I have been but I don’t want to be. Since tapping into my saintlier side hasn’t always quite arrived to me with the ease and grace I’m working towards, for lack of better terms, I have faked it. At times, I have expressed my passionate sentiments and then retracted it. Other times, I have found enough space to consider and censor what I might have said, thereby amending it before verbalizing it.

Ladylike in paisley ruffles and a vegan moto jacket.

Ladylike in paisley ruffles and a vegan moto jacket

Lately, I find that I often, though not always, have no reaction. After all, I’m not in bumper to bumper traffic by myself. We’re all in it together, no single driver is responsible for this, no particular individual is out to get me. But I had to fake it a lot to get to this place. I practiced being the person I wanted to be until I became it.

Rockin' out with my still amazing 5 week old haircut

Rockin’ out with my still amazing 5 week old haircut

There I am, in traffic, hanging out until I get through it, preferably with some good tunes coming through the speakers. And yes, I’m that person rockin’ out by herself in traffic. In her paisley dress and awesome haircut.

 
 

Becoming invisible

17 Jan

{ daily outfit: }

Daily outfit wearing magenta t-shirt, violet cardigan, black skinny jeans, black knee-high boots

{ personal: }

I just read an article about aging and becoming invisible. Yes, I think about this sometimes. I don’t dwell on it much but there are times I worry. There is nothing anyone can say about my current state that guarantees that I will not become invisible with time. Invisible to younger people, invisible to men. Just invisible. We live in a youth-centric culture and this is the reality.

I look in the mirror and I’m confused. I see the changes on my skin, I’m mostly fascinated with it. It, the skin of a 44 year old woman. It’s different. We’re all different but I what I mean is that my skin is different than it used to be. If you’re not there yet, get used to the idea, you’ll see when you get there. If you’re there, or you’ve been there, you know exactly what I’m talking about. It’s fine, really. But there is this small voice in my head that asks a lot of questions. Like, will I be equally surprised with my appearance at 60 as I am now? Will I ever feel that my insides and my outsides match again? When did that stop? How will others continue to see me? When will I stop looking as sprite as I feel? Will it make me sad? I’ve enjoyed it this far, will I even be bothered to care? I’m inclined to think I’ll care some.

I don’t want to become invisible. I think it’s more than vanity, I think it’s primal. The old and the weak got left behind because they no longer served the purpose of procreating or hunting and gathering. No one wants to be left behind. No woman, no man. What’s my plan? I have to have a plan, I can’t just plow through my 40′s and 50′s with reckless abandon and wake up to the shock of having become invisible. I’m really comfortable with the gradual changes taking place, let’s keep it that way. Besides, when I turn 60 I probably won’t think that’s very old at all and I’ll be confused by the whole damn experience.

Not long ago, I would walk to the train station everyday by myself the five blocks from my house. Every once in a while, a total stranger would say something very nice to me as I made my way with purse, lunch bag and gym bag in tow. Every single time it took me by surprise. It’s not that I don’t think I look nice, it’s that they made an effort and went out of their way. The kindness of strangers. And I would wonder, what did they see? I just doesn’t matter how good I look, how young one might think I appear, there is no doubt in my mind that some things cannot be falsified, such as the fact that I’m not 25, or even 30. I see my face, my body, every morning. I know what I look like. It doesn’t matter. Even if I embodied absolute physical perfection, they were compelled to go out of their way. They had no obligation to verbally express what they experienced. I would have been none the wiser.

I lived in San Francisco, a city teaming with young beautiful women walking down the same streets as me. What made me different?

It’s not that I don’t accept that some might find me attractive, it’s that I truly believe that something else made me stand out. The kindness within. As I’ve gotten older I’ve become more and more comfortable being nice. Not polite. Nice. I will stop and ask if someone needs help. This next part is actually more significant. If, and when, I hear my judgmental inner voice spout something I don’t like about anyone, I will correct it. I check myself. Why did I make that judgment? Has a button been pushed? It’s not what I think, it’s what I do with that thought, that judgement. It’s static noise that has no power if I ignore or correct it. And guess what? It’s made me nicer. I’ve always been that person but I haven’t always given that person power. Now I have and I think others see it.

Kindness. Fairness. Generosity. As I’ve been changing how I see the world, I’ve been changing how the world sees me. So if you want to know what I intend do about becoming invisible with age, I just shared with you the only trick I have up my sleeve.

That’s my plan and I’m sticking to it.

{ deets: }

Magenta t-shirt/Urban Outfitters, violet cardigan/Anthropologie, leopard-spotted jacket/Sandro, black skinny jeans/Urban Outfitters, knee-high snake-skin pattern boots/Kelsi Dagger, multi-color scarf/gifted.

{ last note: }

You might have noticed my Google Friend Connect widget has been taken down. I found out that Google is discontinuing this product soon, I figured I might as well get used to no longer relying on it. There are still a variety of ways to subscribe to updates for this blog. In the meantime, I’d be delighted if you left me your url in the comment box, I’ll do my best to visit.

 

That cheap thing?

08 Jul

{ daily outfit: }

Daily outfit and style tips, wearing lace sleeves ruffle top, wide belt, neutral sack skirt

Daily outfit and style tips, wearing lace sleeves ruffle top, wide belt, neutral sack skirt

{ style tip: }

If you’re like me sometimes you drop serious cash for an item, other times you don’t. The two most popular philosophies when it comes to parting with our cash go something like this: You choose carefully, opting for quality and longevity over quantity, or you want it all and you want it now, where’s the clearance rack?

That’s all fine and dandy, I’m not one to judge. In fact, you might have already spotted me trying to make my way through the H&M clearance racks snagging ten- and fifteen-dollar items like they’re going out of style. They probably are, but that’s not the point.

The point is, not all cheap things need to look so cheap.

Let’s face it, there are tell-tale signs that immediately put what you’re wearing in the cheap camp. I’m going to help you identify them, then I’ll help you fix them. Let’s start with strings. You know those little bits of string that serve no purpose but seem to be hanging for dear life off the edge of your seam or the hem of your skirt? DON’T PULL! Stop right there, get a small pair of sharp scissors and cut them. Conduct a thorough inspection and remove all of them once and for all. Do this before you ever leave the house in that garment.

Daily outfit and style tip tools

Next, check the buttons. Nothing says “bargain” like a bunch of buttons ready to jump ship. Do yourself a favor and invest in small sewing kit. Even a travel kit will do. Secure those cute little things and you’ll be happy for days to come.

So you bought yourself a cute top that came with a fake leather belt that’s cracking and fraying. It’s coming undone before you’ve even worn it. Lose the belt. You probably have a much nicer one in your closet, it’s ok if it’s not the one that came with that top. Really.

That travel sewing kit you just picked up is going to come in really handy when you discover a couple stitches that have come undone. Secure a few stitches on the underside in a matching color and stop the madness of unraveling. In fact, I had to do that to the skirt I’m wearing in the picture above.

Since I’m nit-picking, I’m going to point out a few more things. If your tags have a propensity to make their presence known, lop those puppies off. A seam ripper is my favorite tool to get the job done right. While you’re at it, get rid of those ribbons that help keep your dress on the hanger, too. They’re impossible to manage and tend to become visible just when you’re finally making peace with looking fabulous. Cut them off and get a hanger specifically for that dress. You’ll be much happier not having to fuss with them.

Lastly, pilling. Cheap stuff, expensive stuff, at some point with enough friction and time, it all wants to pill. I know it’s really boring but getting one of those little sweater shavers can bring new life to an old sweater or pair of pants. I found that they work best when tapping the shaver onto the area of the pill gently, over and over again. Going side to side never seems to work as well, it tends to flatten the pills.

There you have it. You made your bargain bin treasure look better and you look well put-together. Now go out there and conquer the world, beautiful!

If you’ve got additional tips or can improve upon any of the above, do share!

{ deets: }

Ivory lace ruffle top/Nordstrom’s, beige skirt/Urban Outfitters, wide belt/Anthropologie, blue suede platform sandals/Barcelona, steampunk dragonfly necklace/gifted. 

{ images: }

Seam ripper, travel sewing kit, sweater shaver

 
9 Comments

Posted in Fashion

 

My tribe

20 Jun

{ daily outfit: }

Daily outfit and style tips, wearing coral ruffle tank, sage green shorts, blazer
Smiling with the flowers

 

I recently went back to the town I grew up in for lunch on a weekend. We were seated and served. All the while I couldn’t help but fixate on the faces around, familiar and strange at the same time. I recognized familial facial features and could take a guess at which families of my childhood they belonged to. How odd to consider that we can look so much like our parents and siblings, our cousins and aunts and uncles that we can be identified by strangers as belonging to our tribe.

Daily outfit and style tips, wearing coral ruffle tank, sage green shorts, blazer
These colors are perfect for spring

I walked into a Lower Haight street bar years ago to have the bartender ask me if I had a sister, proceeding to then describe my sister. We didn’t even live in the same city let alone run in the same circles. She was referring to my youngest sister who’s seven years younger than me, has slightly lighter skin and very long curly black hair.

At the time, I had very short blond hair.

I know we look alike but it’s because I know we’re about the same size, I know her face and her expression as intimately as I know my own. But how does a stranger know? Do we look so much like family in a poorly lit neighborhood bar that we give it away that easily?

I’m always amazed at the similarities between my sisters and I; the same smile, the same exact reactions and facial expressions to what someone said. What a precious thing it is to experience bits of myself in the mirror of my tribe.

Daily outfit and style tips, wearing coral ruffle tank and rose necklace
Delicate rose necklace was a gift from the hubby

{ style tip: }

As you’ve probably noticed by now, I’m hooked on this whole notion of dressing up shorts. These soft sage green shorts poof and pucker out like a little skirt. The high paper-bag waist redefines the waistline. To offset the bottom half, I chose a more form-fitting top and a simple fitted blazer. Platform sandals, (my favorite new shoe), and sandy beige flower pattern tights elongated my legs. I exchanged the sausage-effect causing DKNY tights that I had worn earlier for Nordstrom’s own brand. The House in the Clouds recommends them!

Last time I wore shorts I seemed to have piqued your interest. Have any of you given though to how you would execute this? I’m curious at how you’re thinking of putting an outfit with shorts together. Now that I’ve come back from vacation I’d like to put a “Show me your shorts” blog event together! Who’s in? You know you want to!

{ deets: }

Soft sage green shorts/ModCloth, coral ruffle tank/Urban Outfitters, sandy beige flower pattern tights/Nordstrom’s, platform sandals/Urban Outfitters, blazer/Nordstrom’s, rose and sparrow necklace/gifted, vintage kimono cuff/Re4m.

{ photos: }

Filip Jach

 

 
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Posted in Fashion

 

30 for 30 Winter, final roundup

12 Mar
Wearing ivory lace dress with black lace tights and obi belt for 30 for 30 roundup

Lace on lace over tights

Wearing burgundy sweater dress with brown shirt for 30 for 30 roundup

Coffee and wine, oh my!

Wearing DKNY wrap over black turtleneck and skinny jeans for 30 for 30 roundup

Not one of my finer creations

Wearing plaid dress over black turtleneck and skinny jeans for 30 for 30 roundup

Feeling a little bit country

Wearing soft pink shirt with tie over black skinny jeans for 30 for 30 roundup

Schoolhouse rock

Wearing red ruffle sweater shrug over black turtleneck and skinny jeans for 30 for 30 roundup

Ruffles ahoy!

 

This won’t be the first time I’m demonstrated my finer ability to count. I just realized that I never got around to wearing item 30. Technically, what we have hear, folks, is a 29  for 29. Since I’m probably the last living remixer at this point, for the sake of just gettin’ it done, I’m calling it a done deal. It’s been fun but I’m ready to chronically repeat again. And wear some new things, too!

It was a little quiet this weekend because I joined some fine ladies in Las Vegas for Style Nation 2011. It was very exciting! Typically, I’d be snowboarding but what’s life when it’s always predictable? The lovely Loudmouth has elaborated a little on the company we’re keeping. Don’t worry, there will be a full report shortly.

Ciao!

 

 

 

 
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Posted in Fashion